Driving Change And Transforming Your Life: An Inspiring Interview With Nelson Tressler

 

We are products of our choices, and we can change everything by making the right choices. Transforming your life means taking responsibility and setting your goals. In this episode, Rodney Flowers sits down with Nelson Tressler, the creator of I Got Smarter as they talk about motivation, inspiration and having the right mindset. Nelson shares the story of his humble beginnings, struggling with dyslexia, and reaching his goals. This is an inspiring episode that is not to be missed. Be sure you don’t!

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Driving Change And Transforming Your Life: An Inspiring Interview With Nelson Tressler

I am excited about the show. I have Nelson Tressler in the studio with me. He is a motivational speaker. He is the Founder and CEO of IGotSmarter|Goals Elevated. Nelson has used goals and personal development to design a life that he couldn’t have imagined as a child born to a fifteen-year-old mother. Nelson became the first person in his family to graduate from college, serving the US Air Force, and become the top worldwide producer for a top commercial real estate company. He started over ten businesses, including one of the country’s largest privately held pet resorts. He’s here to discuss his new book, how to bounce back, and how to be resilient in the face of any hardship. Without further ado, let’s welcome, Nelson Tressler to the show.

Thanks for having me, Rodney. I appreciate it.

Thank you for being here and before we get into everything we’re going to talk about, I want to ask you, given where we are and the circumstances that are going on in the world, how are you doing?

I’m doing good. I’m trying to make the best of it and use what the world and the environment are giving me to further what I want to do with my life. I’m trying to make the most of it.

What do you mean by using what the world is giving you? A lot of people would feel like it’s giving them a bunch of crap.

When we shut down in 2020, I had a book that I wanted to write. I never seem to have the time and the focus to be able to do it. When we were locked down and not able to go anywhere else, that gave me the perfect opportunity to sit down and work on my book for eight hours a day. I was able to publish that book, The Unlucky Sperm Club, in November of 2020. Without this pandemic, which has been horrible on a lot of different fronts, that gave me the opportunity to finally sit down, hunker down, focus, not have any distractions, and get that book done. I might not have ever finished that book. Who knows?

How do you look at challenges and struggles or setbacks? Have things changed since you’ve come out of the pandemic? We’re still in it but since experiencing the pandemic.

I’ve always tried to look at things like I understand you can’t control what happens to you or what people do to you or what is going on in the world. What you can control is how you respond to it. I’ve always tried to have that mindset that, “I’m going to do something that’s going to further my goals, that’s going to help me get to where I want to go.” I’ve always tried to do that and I’ve done the same thing with this pandemic. I love the strategy. Things only have the meaning that you’re willing to give them. What that means is you get to assign meaning to everything that happens to you.

You are the author of that and if you get to write that story and assign that meaning for whatever happens to you, why on Earth are you assigning a negative meaning that’s not going to further your goals, make you happy or joyful? Assign something good. Believe me, it’s hard. You got to look at it from a lot of different angles sometimes and get very creative for some situations. I’ve always found that if you look hard enough and long enough and with enough inspiration, you’ll always find that silver lining in every situation that crosses your path in your life.

You’ve written a book and you are a motivational speaker. What got you started with motivating people and writing books?

I’ve got quite the origin story. My mom became pregnant with me when she was fifteen years old. While she was pregnant with me, her father who was the local trash collector in a small town in Pennsylvania drove into the town square. There he spotted two police officers. He stuck a gun out the window and opened fire on those police officers, killing one and critically wounding the other. Eventually, my grandfather was captured and brought to stand trial where he was facing the death penalty. During his murder trial, my mom got up and testified that the reason that her father had shot and killed that police officer was that the police officer had raped her. She was now pregnant with his baby who was me. My mom’s testimony worked. My grandfather’s first trial ended in a hung jury.

You can't control what happens to you or what people do to you or what is going on in the world, but you can control how you respond to it. Click To Tweet

Eventually, the state took the death penalty off the table because of my mom’s testimony. My grandfather was found guilty and sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole where he ended up spending the rest of his life for more than 40 years behind bars. He leaves behind in this small town fifteen children, including my mom and now me, to deal with all the things that a small town has waiting for you when something like this happens in your family. Being born to a fifteen-year-old mother is hard enough.

Eventually, my mom met a man who would become my stepfather. We quickly found out that he was an alcoholic, very physically and emotionally abusive to me and my mom, and beatings either me, her or both of us almost on a daily basis. My mom and stepfather had four kids in quick succession. With the lifestyle they’re living, a lot of the basic needs of my siblings are falling upon me as the oldest, diaper changing, bottle-feeding, waking up at 2:00 AM to put crying babies back to sleep. That’s the way my life was going. It had a hugely adverse effect on pretty much every area of my life but specifically at school. I remember the last day of fourth grade, you get all excited to go find out who you’re going to have for fifth grade and who your homeroom teacher is. I remember looking down at my report card that last day of fourth grade and seeing that I had straight F’s. I wouldn’t be going on to the fifth grade. I had flunked the fourth grade.

At this time in my life, I couldn’t read, write and spell. I probably missed 60 days of school that year because my mom would rather me stay home and help her with the kids than go to school. The next year I got placed into special ed to get the help that I needed. I came to find out I had dyslexia. That’s the way my life was going until one day, my stepfather was walking home drunk from a bar. Somebody else was driving home drunk from a bar and they ended up hitting and killing him. My mom’s life has been brutal up to this point. She’s dropped out of school in the eighth grade. She’s never worked outside of the home. She has five small children and no matter how she looks at this thin, what lens or what angle, she cannot figure out how she’s ever going to be able to care for five small children on her own.

It’s at this time that she decides that she’s going to take her own life. She attempted suicide. Fortunately, she was not successful. When she did get out of the hospital, that’s when our family got split up. That’s when I went to go live with my grandmother who was the wife of the man who shot and killed the police officer. For the first time in my life, there’s always food in the house, the lights are always turned on, and there was always heat in the house in the winter, which was not the case with my mom. I started to reflect upon where my life was heading. Even though things and my basic survival instincts were being met, where my life was going was not where I wanted it to go.

We're not victims of our circumstances. We're products of our choices. We are exactly where we choose to be. Click To Tweet

One day, a counselor came in to talk about what it would take to get into college, bells and whistles started going off in my mind. It’s like, “If I could go to college and get a college degree, after getting that college degree, my life would be easy and perfect.” That was my mindset. Do you know what happens whenever you start to think you’re going to try to do something hard and difficult? That voice in the back of your head starts screaming at you all the reasons you shouldn’t even try it. I remember thinking, “Nelson, you’re in special ed. You can’t read, write and spell.” Of that family that I came from, of those 15 children, only 2 of them had ever even gone graduated high school. None had even gone to college. I started thinking to myself, “Nelson, you’re going to be lucky to graduate high school, let alone college,” but I went for it because I had no other options. Long story short, it took 12 years, 4 different universities, 4 years in the United States Air Force. Eventually, I became the first person in my family to get a college degree and graduate from college.

I don’t know if I want to say that it’s an amazing story, but it’s one of triumph. What is your message in all of this with what you’ve gone through and being able to come out on the other side, a success story? What have you gained through all of that you would like to share with the audience?

That’s why I wrote The Unlucky Sperm Club. There are a lot of people who are out there in very tough circumstances. We tend to become victims of those circumstances. We want to let those circumstances define us. My message is we’re not victims of our circumstances. We’re products of our choices. I truly believe that we are exactly where we choose to be. If we don’t want to be where we’re at, we need to make different choices. We need to choose to be somewhere else. I want people to understand that they are in control of their own lives. They need to take 100% responsibility for their own success. That doesn’t mean that the world and people aren’t fighting against you, but when you take that 100% responsibility for your success, then you’re in control of it.

If you’re going to be successful, it might be harder. You might have to overcome huge obstacles but you’re in charge. In fact, you’re the person who can do it. Many other people want to assign their problems and their issues to other things and other people and other situations. All of a sudden, they’ve lost all power and control because they’ve assigned it to somebody else. The only way that things are going to get fixed if you assign your problems or your issues to somebody else is something else or somebody else has to change. You’re sitting back waiting for that situation to change. When you take that 100% responsibility for your success, now you’re in charge. If you want things to change, then you need to change and you can do that.

 

Do you feel like that’s easier said than done?

No, I don’t. Are there hard situations? Absolutely. Was it hard for me to get a college degree with dyslexia and coming from a family that only had two people who graduated from high school and the circumstances of my birth? Absolutely, it is hard. Success is hard. Everything in life that is worth working for is hard. If it was easy, everybody would do it. There are some horrible circumstances out there. Everybody’s circumstances are different. I feel they are equally hard. Somebody who had maybe parents that degraded them or whatever, maybe that’s as debilitating as being abused for somebody else. I don’t want to compare trials when it comes to life because everybody deals with them differently and they’re all equally hard.

I don’t think it’s easier said than done. You need to make that decision. One decision is not going to change your life, but one decision can change the direction of your life. That’s something that people need to realize too. This is a process. Whenever I set out that goal to become the first person in my family to graduate college and made that decision, my life didn’t change. I still couldn’t read, write and spell. I still had dyslexia. I still was in this town where my family name meant everything, where I was that kid from that trial. It wasn’t easy but when I made that decision, I changed the direction of my life. I knew where I wanted to go. All I had to do was continue on that path and make those choices and decisions that were going to get me there. I believe anybody can do that.

How does someone deal with hard? There are people out there that are dealing with tough things, not just physically, emotionally, intellectually or spiritually tough. It’s challenging so when you say, “It’s not easier said than done.” If I’m facing hard and it’s really hard, and I feel like I’m trying everything here and I’m not gaining any traction, what is your response to that person?

You got to try something else. We can’t just quit when things get hard. The only reason that we’ve heard of anybody who’s had any success in their lives is they didn’t quit. I love to read biographies of successful people. Almost without exception, when you read those biographies, they were one choice from quitting, laying down and giving up but they didn’t do that. They kept going and the reason that they kept going was that’s why we’ve heard of them because they became successful. I truly believe if you have enough time, energy and focus, you can accomplish any goal. People need to realize that. Is it going to be hard?

First of all, I don’t think that we should pursue every goal. I’m 5’10”. I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to make the NBA. I can’t shoot and jump. That’s probably not a goal that I should pursue. Realistically, if I had enough time, focus and energy, I might need 100 years and great health to be able to do it but I could. With any goal that we put our mind to, we can accomplish if we don’t quit. In the program, IGotSmarter, we have a self-assessment. It’s about getting crystal clear on what you want and what goals you want in your life, and then once you’re crystal clear on those, it’s like, “I’m going with those goals. I’m not giving up on them. I might take a little bit longer and a different path,” but because we hit roadblocks, that doesn’t mean we adjust the goals. It means we adjust the way that we’re going to get there and the timeframe or the energy that we need to put forth to achieve it.

If we don't want to be where we're at, we need to make different choices. We need to choose to be somewhere else. Click To Tweet

There’s an idea or conception about hard. This has come up several times in other shows that I’ve hosted. I have the issue with hard, for the simple fact that life has been hard. Life is hard for a lot of people. I’ve come to learn that hard is like a story you tell yourself. It’s a comparison as well. Hard compared to maybe something else that you’ve tried in your life before. It’s nothing more than resistance. It could be resistance at a high level. It’s a mountain of resistance versus a little bit of resistance. If you’re swimming against the current and it’s a low current. It’s easier to swim against than a heavy current. There’s a lot of water and weight behind it so it’s going to be harder to do it. Nevertheless, in both cases, it’s possible to swim upstream and against the current to overcome the force of the current.

We stop at the idea that it’s difficult. We don’t get to the idea of it’s possible. Being hard becomes a stronger concept in many cases than believing that it’s possible. We take on hard and we put it on. That is hard, “I believe it’s hard and I’m feeling that it’s hard.” That begins to shape our perception, belief and behavior towards the thing that we are considering hard versus if we had a stronger belief and perception, a thought process regarding the possibility and we put that on. That dictates the behavior and the action towards the thing that we’re doing.

You’re going to get two different results from comparing those two different beliefs or perceptions and trying on those ideas. For people that are reading that may be dealing with hard, that’s the trick and the game-changer. Sometimes we focus more on the difficulty versus the possibility. Therefore, the feeling of that difficulty is what’s really driving the bus versus the opportunity of the possibility versus that driving the bus. At least it was a trick for me. I’m going to say that was a turning point and a trigger. It was focusing not on the difficulty because every day is hard. It’s still hard and there are days that it’s just hard. It’s challenging.

The opportunity to experience a possibility or said the other way, the possibility to experience an opportunity and getting over this bottleneck, this tough portion in life and experience that is unfamiliar, new, or challenging, and then get to a place where I’ve overcome that. If you’re reading this and that is enticing, rewarding and going to make an impact, what would that feel and be like once you are able to experience the possibility? The idea that I can enjoy and experience that opportunity makes the hardness worth it.

 

The one thing that I believe is every one of our beliefs is a choice as well. We’re choosing to believe something. You’re talking a lot about mindset there. If your beliefs are not furthering you and they’re not helping you achieve your goals. If you have a belief in something that’s pulling you away from your goals like the mindset that you’re talking about, you have to have resistance if you’re going to grow. One of the things in our program, IGotSmarter, the I is an acronym. It stands for the individual and everything starts and ends when you’re achieving your goals with the individual that you currently are. If you haven’t achieved a goal, chances are you need to become a better version of yourself and that individual who can achieve that goal.

That doesn’t happen without resistance. You have to grow. If any of us have ever done any exercise or weight training, the only time that our muscles grow is when they have resistance. That’s a lot of the way our minds work too. If we live this plush life and we don’t have those hard times to make us grow emotionally, mentally and physically, we need resistance. What’s your mindset on that? When you hit that resistance, do you throw up your hands and say, “This is hard. I’m going to quit,” or is your mindset, “I need resistance to grow. This is going to help me grow. What is this going to do for me? How am I going to come out the other end? What type of person am I going to come out at?” You can have those mindsets and be at rock bottom or it can be a stepping stone. It’s the exact same situation. It is your mind and what you believe.

How do we get people to do that? You’re seasoned and you’ve experienced enough challenge and resistance in your life to develop that mental muscle that you can turn that switch on and off on demand. There are people who may not have had that humbling experience in their life, maybe this is the first one or maybe they just haven’t developed it. They don’t have the opportunity to create that self-awareness to realize that, “This is a mental game versus a physical game.” How does one develop that? What would you say to that person who is maybe struggling from a mental place to get to that level of strength?

It’s like muscle and physical therapy. If you damage a muscle, you go see a physical therapist and they’re moving that muscle, strengthening and taking care of it. If we’re dealing with something mentally or emotionally, what are we putting into our brains to help us? Are we watching inspiring videos and something that’s going to motivate us? Who are we surrounding ourselves with? The people we surround ourselves with are going to have a huge impact on how we feel and what our emotional strength is and everything. Look around at that. Are you putting the good things into your brain that are going to help you see the way out? Are you fueling the despair or whatever you’re feeling through what you’re watching, reading or who you’re around? You have to treat your emotional anguish like you would some physical ailment. You have to strengthen it. You do that by what you’re watching, reading and listening to, and the people who you’re around. What are they doing for you? Are they supporting you or are they feeding your belief that you’re never going to get out of this?

One of the things we have to remember whenever we’re facing challenges is the fact that we have more control than we think. A lot of times, we feel that we have a lack of control because we can’t control the situation. We can’t control the outer world. There’s so much going on out there and it’s impressing upon your inner world and upon you that it is seemingly controlling you but it’s not. I’ve learned that there’s an inner world, which is you, the inner world inside of you, which has everything to do with how you respond and how you feel about the situations that are going on out there. It’s important that we recognize how we feel about what’s going on out there so that we can bring it under control because of the feelings and reactions, it’s what you say that dictates who we are and how we respond.

If you want things to change, then you need to change. Click To Tweet

We focus a lot on the outside world, everything that’s going on out there, the distractions and challenges, and what it’s doing to us. We don’t focus enough on how we behave and respond to the things that are going on out there and how that has an impact on it. Just like the world has an impact on you, you have an impact on the world. Things are coming into you, then there are things that are projecting out of you as well based on your reactions, responses, self-awareness, beliefs, thoughts and perceptions. All of that can change and impress upon what’s going on out there. Based on your values, beliefs, vision and the person that you want to become, you have the ability to shape and mold things in the outer world that’s based on how you are feeling in the inner world.

What I mean by that is I’m going to tell you a story. When I got hurt and suffered a spinal cord injury, I was mad at the world and everyone in it. It felt like my world was upside down, and it was because I was fifteen years old when I suffered a spinal cord injury. It’s like, “What is my life going to be like?” I can’t move and I’m paralyzed from the neck down. I was mad at the world and everyone in it, and I had this nasty attitude. As a result of having that attitude, I wasn’t pleasant to be around. No one wanted to be around me and I didn’t want to be around anyone else. I felt ungrateful and as if I was betrayed, and life had rejected me or somehow punished me or something. As a result of those feelings, every day was miserable.

Every day wasn’t miserable because I got hurt. Every day was miserable because I was miserable and I was projecting misery. Something has changed. Over time I began to realize that this accident happened, but it was also an opportunity because if I would put forth the effort to overcome it, it could inspire, cause an impact, and create something positive out of a very negative situation. I decided to be that guy and started to look at possibilities. What if you felt better and had a better attitude today? What if you are grateful? What if you look at what you can do instead of what you can’t do? What if you look at what’s possible for you? That’s when my inner world began to change and started affecting the outer world.

I started looking at what was possible and I started seeing things that were possible for me even in this situation. It kept opening up other opportunities and possibilities. I changed the world around me by changing the world within me. I started projecting out all this positivity. It’s a complete success story and millions of people are impacted. It wouldn’t have gone that way if I would’ve stayed close-minded or not taken control of the inner world instead of allowing what happened to me on the outside to control what I feel on the inside. You have that power of choice. You choose that. It’s so important that we take that step back and assess how we feel and the situation before we judge it and call it hard. It may just need a little tweak in perception, vision and attitude. That can change everything. We don’t have to get to that place of feeling overwhelmed and defeated. You can just feel like, “I need to make an adjustment.”

 

Your story is similar to mine because, for the longest time, I was bitter about dealing with the consequences of what my grandfather had done, what my mom had testified to, and living in that small town. That story, I had never told anybody. When I joined the Air Force and I moved away from that town, I never moved back to that town because everything there weakened me. It was a struggle. I was always that kid and it had a negative meaning to me. The only person I ever told that story to was my wife. I’d figure I owe it to her. I need to tell her that before she marries me. I never told my kids and my friends because that story weakened me.

One day when I’m trying to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life after I was able to exit some of these businesses, I thought upon, “Why did I live the life that I had lived?” I live this life so that I could help other people, inspire and motivate them with my story. It’s the same exact story. The only thing that changed was I gave it a different meaning. Now, not only do I love telling that story but I’m also going on podcasts and doing interviews and telling that story to the world as opposed to not ever wanting anybody to know about it again. The only thing that changed was that I gave it a different meaning. I gave it a meaning that was going to help, inspire and motivate me.

As horrible as things that happened to us, we get that opportunity. There are situations like your story, Rodney. You had to dig deep to find good in what had happened to you. I’m sure that was a struggle and it’s a struggle for other people. You were able to do it and because you were able to do it, now your mindset and your life are different, not because anything changed and the things that happened to you went away. It’s because, you started to give them a different and positive meaning that was going to make you happy, further your life and vision of what you wanted to do. I think everybody out there has the ability to do that. Is it easy? We talked a lot about hard things. It’s not easy but is it worth it? We’re both here and it proves that it’s worth it to give those hard things in your life to try to find that positive meaning and then use that meaning to go where you want to go.

It’s seemingly challenging or hard but it doesn’t mean you’re not supposed to do it. It means you have to put forward a little bit more effort. It’s the difference between a small plane and a big plane. It doesn’t take as much thrust to get a small plane in the air as it would a huge 747. It’s going to take more effort to do it but yet, if you can pull it off and now you have more passengers, a bigger plane with more capacity and cargo space, whatever you want to call it. It’s a benefit to putting forth the effort to getting over it. If the mountain is bigger than you climb, then that means you have a larger slope that you can slide down on the other side of it. It’s worth it. The climb is the teacher. The slope is the pleasure of having taken the climb. That’s all it is.

If you have enough time, enough energy, and enough focus, you can accomplish any goal. Click To Tweet

I want people to understand that the climb is always longer. It’s like this and it’s funny that you have the title of your book, but the climax is always going to be shorter than the process. That’s what it is. The climax is worth it. After that’s over, now we’ve got to start this process all over again because we’re onto the next level of things. You don’t live in this climax. It’s there and short-lived but it’s perfect because you get a hit now and another hit but you got to go through this process to get this hit. Through this process, you’re growing and developing that mental muscle. Before you know it, you’re able to take on climbs. You have the experience that allows you to do it more efficiently and effectively. It’s something that you’ve become an expert at and you’re becoming an expert in life and someone who has the skillset and the mindset to navigate the challenges of life.

That’s beautiful when you are that person, especially when things are changing so fast. You have to have the ability, agility and adaptability to adjust on the fly without any manuals or even someone saying, “It’s time to adjust.” You have this innate natural ability to do that. It’s great when we can see people that do that. We call those people very successful but it’s the hours that you put in on the climb, going through this process, that gives you that on-the-job experience to be able to execute it in that way.

I love your analogy of the mountain, slope and slide down. I feel like that now. I’ve gotten to the point in my life where it was a struggle and climbing that slope sucked but when I wake up, I have to pinch myself. I’m living a life that I couldn’t have even imagined and I celebrated my wedding anniversary. You didn’t use to have all these things but that grind and climbing that slope was worth it. That’s another thing that we all have to work on as we’re trying to live these lives that we want to live. It’s to have that long-term perspective. We’ve talked about the world and what’s going on out there.

One of the hardest things that are going on out there is everybody wants that instant success. We look on social media and all of a sudden, you see all these people who are “overnight” millionaires. Everybody wants it now. They want it quick and with as little work as possible. People see that so often they think that’s what happens. It’s not what happens. We have to have that long-term perspective. We need to know the things that you’re doing now might not show any signs of progress but eventually, if you have that understanding, this is all going to be worth it.

In my book, The Unlucky Sperm Club, I used to talk about my marriage. Many years ago, we went through a rough patch back in the recession and the economy. I was days away from going bankrupt. I and my wife were probably one 1 or 2 arguments away from getting divorced but we both had that long-term perspective. We both knew we wanted to stay married. We toughed it out through the hard times to eventually get to the good times. If we weren’t willing to do that, we wouldn’t still be married and be enjoying the benefits of sticking it out. That goes with business too. I was ready to throw up my hands and give it all back and like, “Take it. I’m done.” Every turn I turned in these businesses during the recession, it wouldn’t work out for me. I was like, “It’s over. I’m going to lose everything. I’ll have to figure out a way,” but I never quit eventually, somehow, someway, I made it through because I had that long-term perspective. I knew where I wanted to end up. I knew it wasn’t easy and it wasn’t going to happen overnight. That’s what people need to realize.

 

Without the valley, there’s no peak. The ocean is a great teacher. The tide goes in and comes out. You have to deal with the low tide and high tide. It’s something you have to learn to deal with. That’s where we are in life. We have to navigate the valleys and know how to enjoy the peaks of life. If you were to delete your childhood, teenage years or your twenties, it would significantly change who you are now. I don’t think we want instant gratification. We think we want that but I don’t think we really want that because you remove the process. Would you want your baby to forgo the nine-month process that it takes for them to incubate and then be ready for birth? Would you say I don’t want my child to go through that? I want my child to come now. Let’s remove that process.

There are some critical things that are happening and necessary. That’s why it takes that long like baking a cake. It takes a while for those things to percolate and do what they need to do in order to get to a place where you are ready and able to enjoy it. This space between where you are and where you want to go is a necessary thing. It’s not so much space. It’s our thoughts towards it. We are the discriminator in all cases in life. It goes back to what you were saying, a choice. I’m not saying you have to be okay with it taking that long. Be okay with it, meaning accept that that’s what it is and then go through it with a positive attitude, “This is what it’s going to take and I’m willing to go through it, no matter how long it takes because that’s what it’s going to take and that’s what it is.” It’s not so much how long it’s going to take it, but is it possible for me to get there?

There are things that you’re going to learn along the way. I believe if it was meant for you to have it now, you’d be the person that can get it now. It takes you becoming the person to get to the destination. Therefore, that’s what fills the space between where you are and where you want to go. Where you want to go is a destination. Who you become along the way is what’s necessary in order for you to get where you want to go.

In the program, IGotSmarter, it’s all about becoming that individual that you need to become. That’s always who we’re working on. It’s that person staring back at you in the mirror every single day. That’s the only person you should be competing against as well. You should only be trying, “Am I better now than I was then?” I don’t care what anybody else is doing out there. I’m not going to hold my happiness over, “Do I have more than them? Am I better than them?” You’re setting yourself up for misery because I got news for you, there’s always someone better out there and vice versa. If you’re one of those people who are, “It’s not that bad. It’s better than Fred down the street has.” You then get into complacency.

We can't compare ourselves to other people because other people's best version is going to be different from our version. Click To Tweet

The only person you should ever compete against in this world is the person you were yesterday and the person that you’re going to be tomorrow. That’s the way that you’re going to live a successful life because we need progress. I believe that we’re put on this Earth to become that best version of ourselves possible. That’s how you’re going to live this life that you want to live. It’s by becoming the best person that you possibly can be. We have a strategy in IGotSmarter. We designed an alter ego and this alter ego is the best version of ourselves. They always make the right decision. We’ve all had that voice in the back of our head like whenever you know that you should or shouldn’t be doing something, that lets you know that. That’s that perfect version of yourself that is always making the right choices.

We designed that person out and we’d give them a name and everything. My alter ego’s name is Fred. Fred always makes the right decisions. If he’s on a diet, he’d never dream of either skipping a workout, maybe sneak in a bite of cake in the fridge or never dream of coming home after having a bad day and screaming at his kids and taking it out on his kids. In fact, my family knows so much about Fred when I do come home and maybe I’m a little irritated. My kid’s question to me is, “Dad, can Fred come out and play?” They know I’m not making those choices that I should. Becoming that better version of ourselves is the end goal.

We all live two lives, the life we’re living and the life we’re capable of living. I’ve heard it put this way as well. When you’re on your death bed, you are meeting the person you could have become. That’s the definition of hell. Did we reach our potential while we were on this Earth? That should be all of our angles, “I’m going to try to become the best version that I possibly can.” Everyone’s version is different and that’s why we can’t be comparing ourselves to other people because other people’s best version is going to be different from our version. Let’s look in the mirror and at that person, and then let’s strive to become that best version that we possibly can while we’re here on this Earth.

Nelson, how can people connect with you if they want to learn more about you?

They can go to NelsonTressler.com and everything’s there, the book, The Unlucky Sperm Club: You are Not a Victim of Your Circumstances but a Product of Your Choices. You can get that there or it’s available everywhere books are sold. Probably Amazon is the easiest. It’s also available in Audible. If you like listening to your books, you can get it there. The IGotSmarter program with Goals Elevated, which is a goal achievement program that helps people achieve their life’s biggest goals, it’s available there. It’s also available at Apple and Android on the App Store.

Just like the world has an impact on you, you have an impact on the world. Click To Tweet

As it relates to bouncing back, dominating our challenges and consistently winning at the game of life, what’s the one thing you would like to leave with us that would ensure that we’re able to conquer our challenges?

Conquering your challenges, the very first thing you have to do is get started doing what you need to do. The one thing that I’ve realized in my process is we don’t have a knowledge problem when it comes to achieving our goals. We have an execution problem. We don’t do what we know we need to do and hopefully, your readers have been inspired by these stories and they’ve gotten all fired up. Don’t wait for everything to be perfect. The only place that you can ever start doing something is where you’re at. Start where you’re at and start now.

Nelson, thank you for coming to the show. It’s been a pleasure having you. Good luck to you and with your book.

We’re giving the IGotSmarter app away for 30 days to try it out. After that, it’s $9 a month. It’s an app that literally in ten minutes a day, you can live. Your life is focused. You know exactly what you need to do. Our slogan is, “If your goals aren’t worth $10 a month or ten minutes a day, you need bigger goals.”

Nelson Tressler, on the show. Thanks for coming to the show.

Thanks, Rodney. I appreciate it.

Important Links:

• IGotSmarter|Goals Elevated
• The Unlucky Sperm Club
• NelsonTressler.com
• Amazon – The Unlucky Sperm Club
• Audible – The Unlucky Sperm Club
• Android – IGotSmarter App
• Apple – IGotSmarterApp
• https://YouTu.be/nvxQ871m2Lg
• https://NelsonTressler.com/freegift/
• https://www.Facebook.com/nelsontressler1
• https://www.Linkedin.com/in/nelson-tressler-75876590/
• Is Life Knocking You Down? Read Rodney’s inspiring story – Get Up! I Can’t. I Will. I Did… Here’s How!
• Recognize Your Positive Potential – Essential Assertions by Rodney Flowers
• Get Access to Rodney’s Daily Inspiration in your Inbox Today

About Nelson Tressler

Nelson Tressler is a Motivational Speaker and the Author of The Unlucky Sperm Club. He is the Founder and CEO of IGotSmarter|Goals Elevated.

Nelson has used goals and personal development to design a life that he couldn’t have imagined as a child born to a 15-year-old mother. Nelson became the first person in his family to graduate from college, served in the US Air Force, became the top worldwide producer for a top commercial real estate company. Started over 10 businesses including one of the country’s largest privately held Pet Resorts.